ALLOW ME TO CHEAT

Say you had a girlfriend. She had the perfect body, an amazing smile and a personality you only see in movies. You fell in love the moment you heard her speak because her voice was the hoarse type. She was just perfect. Perfect until she kissed you. Ooh my god!! She is awful. You never want her to kiss you. She sucks your entire lips to the point where it is not sexy but actually painful now. So you pretend to always peck her and enjoy the tight hugs more than the kissing. That is the only wooden vessel in her golden world.

You swear you love this woman. She brings out the man in you. The beast that just grabs her and you know what. She also makes you this soft guy that cares about her feelings. You would hold her bag in a mall while she goes to the ladies. Once in a while pretend to watch a reality with her and end up loving it more than she did. Yes, she is that sort of a lady. You love her too now don’t you?

Let’s push in a little deeper now. Say she understood you are not perfect as a man and yet loved your weaknesses more because she knows that’s when she is at her strongest. Okay, the point is that you are in love with her. The mere thought of her arouses you. You get the point. But she is the worst kisser in the world. And for you kissing is like the most important thing. It turns you on. You can actually leave a woman because of it. By now you must know that you don’t want to leave her. I am conflicted myself whether to stay or cheat.

I guess now here is where I ask the big question. Would you allow me to cheat and remain loyal to you? Even just the kissing part pekee?

When I began writing this article, I had intended to say it was a joke but now that I think about it, I am not so sure anymore. For girls, just insert he where it says she and everything is okay in the discriminatory world.

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